Leadership: September 2, 1999

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A presidential advisory program led by former Senator Warren Rudman has proposed taking all responsibility for nuclear weapons away from the Department of Energy due to its "abominable record of security".--Stephen V Cole

While the Pentagon is already issuing certificates of appreciation for military personnel who served during the Cold War, the Senate is still determined to issue a Cold War Victory Medal.--Stephen V Cole

AND FOR COMIC RELIEF, What will Bill Clinton do after he retires as President? He is too young to stay home, not a good enough lawyer to be an asset to a top-level firm, and his political connections may be too embarrassing to serve him as a lobbyist. The obvious choice for his next career move is to become Secretary-General of the UN. Besides the convenience of being based in the same city as his soon to be senatorial wife, the UNSG job is the only way he can "move up" from the presidency. It is also the only place where he can get more kickbacks -- and dates -- than the Oval Office. The idea is not totally ridiculous. The UNSG job will be open soon, and Kofi Annan cannot succeed himself since he was chosen to fill the second "African" term of UNSG Ghali. As the job rotates, it is going to next be the turn of someone from the "Western Europe and Other" group which includes the US. Bill Clinton would be perfect, since while he is an American, he is the most anti-American American of his generation. With a former US President running the UN, the US could hardly say "no" to anything the UN wanted to do, from birth control seminars to raising the US share of the UN's budget. And yet, Bill Clinton would be more likely to favor the UN over his own birthright. --Anonymous

 


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